Planet of the Jakes: Deblett

In our clan, we all have this tendency to re-name one another.  We’re much like the Native Americans, changing our names as needed.

stereotypes are not funny!
stereotypes are not funny!

But, Jakob?  He takes it to a whole nuther level.   Like the time he changed the first letter in everyone’s name to an “R”.  “Dad” became “Rad”.  “Nat” became “Rat”.  Etc ad infinitum.  Then there was the time “Rake” started called his friend Tom…Obama?!?!  How do you go from Tom to Obama?  It’s a good question.  It’s almost like 7 degrees of Kevin Bacon.  Jake starts off calling Tom, “Bom”.  It evolves to Bama and from there it’s only a short jump to Obama.

the thing is, the lil red headed Irish kid looks EXACTLY like the prez.
the thing is, the lil red headed Irish kid looks EXACTLY like the prez.

What can I say?  The kid’s out there.

At the beginning of the summer, the kids went on vacation with their mother for a week.  When the kids are gone for that long, I know some strange shit is bound to go down.  And sure enough, as the kids are piling into the van when I went to pick them up, Jakob turns to Jett and said

the family roadster.
the family roadster.

“Deblett (pronounced D bl. The “ett” is all silent.)  Did you remember the PS3 controller?”

“Yea, Rake (I told you this shit sticks).  I’ve got the controller!”  Jethro responded from the back of the van.

Sitting in the driver’s seat, I turned to face Jakob in the seat behind me.  “Wait.  What did you call him?”

“Deblett.”  Natalia answered with a stupid smile.  “He called him Deblett.”

I could feel the confusion stitch across my face.  “Deblett?!?!?”

“Yep!’  Natalia answered again, rather cheerfully, Jakob settling into his seat across from her in the van.

“Rake?”  I turned completely around.

He only shrugged in reply.

“Jethro.”  I called out, looking in the rear view mirror at the boy.  “Did you convert to French or something?”

i repeat...stereotypes ARE NOT funny!
i repeat…stereotypes ARE NOT funny!

“Nope.”  He replied matter of factly.  “Rake started calling me “Blett” earlier in the week.  Now it’s “Deblett”.”

I looked at Jakob through the rear view.  “Rake?”

He just shrugged again in reply.

“Whatever.”  I said, putting the van into gear.

“You should see the glasses Rake got, Rad.”  Natalia said with a sneaky smirk.

“Yea?”  I asked.

“Yep!”  She chuckled.  “Ask him to show you when we get home.”

To be continued… 


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